Back in my childhood, I drew things. I love drawing. I love drawing because I hated everything else. I hated sports because I failed at them, I hated math because most of what I learn was moot the next year, and I hated people because I could never feel comfortable around anyone. Usually when I hate things, I tend to want to destroy them. Drawing is pretty much my way of, well...not destroying things. I mostly drew things in my childhod just to keep my head cool. I mostly used drawing to seclude myself from people. A lot of people like what I did. But I had talent, not skill. You might think I'm good at what I do. I think wat you think is bullshit! I suck ass! I'm in a rut and it frustratess me. I have lots of ideas, but I can't execute them anymore. Why? I'm making an attempt to learn some new techniques and let me tell you, it sucks the life out of drawing for me. It's no longer "Hee hee, this is fun! Way better then hitting people with chairs because they're too dumb to live." Now it's "FUCKITHINKIDIDTHISWRONGWHYCAN'TIWORKPROPERPROPORTIONSTOGOODPOSESFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU--" I am frustrated. I do not like not knowing things! It's makes me look stupid! Why can't I accomplish the most meaningless crap!
"Stop complaining Francis! Just because you been cartooning for 18 year and counting does not mean you should complian about doing something new" Fuck shut up! I know! Damination! I can't even draw to vent! Damination! When I want to draw, when I acctually have the time to draw, I have crapshit! Yet, I have work pileing up, guess wat I do? Doodle around like a dipshit! Damination! I really want to hit something! I really want to draw something.
...I hate having feelings...
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